Drunken Black Magic
by whitetigerwolf
Summary: After a night of drinking in celebration of the defeat of Voldemort, Harry and his friends find themselves waking up in Roanapur...in the beds of some very dangerous people. M for language, Drinking, Adult situations. One-Shot. COMPLETE. Please Review.


**I Do Not own Harry Potter or Black Lagoon**

**This is just a short funny story I'm writing for shits, giggles, and my love of both Black Lagoon and Harry Potter universes.**

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Harry James Potter-Black, Lord of the Most Ancient and Noble Houses of Potter and Black, immediately regretted all that he had drunk the previous night.

The seventeen year old wizard and his friends, Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, Neville Longbottom, Ginny Weasley, and Luna Lovegood had gotten together to celebrate the defeat of the Dark Lord Voldemort. They'd gone to a muggle pub, and had been surprised to find Draco Malfoy there as well. Already a little drunk, they'd somehow ended up drinking with the Blonde former Deatheater.

To be honest, Harry didn't remember much beyond the…was it third bottle?

The point was that he and his friends had gotten well and truly hammered. And the first thing he realized when he awoke was that his head felt like it had undergone about fifty simultaneous cruciatus curses. Not wanting to get up, he tried snuggling further into his bed.

That was when he realized the second thing.

His pillow had a nipple.

Opening his eyes, Harry was ecstatic for the low lighting, though he still blinked rapidly. And he was more than thankful that he was nearsighted since he wasn't wearing his glasses.

Right in front of his eyes was a very naked breast.

After a few moments, his hung-over mind finally caught up with him and he began to realize several other things.

The room smelled of sex. The very voluptuous breast was attached to an Asian looking woman he had never met. There was another set of breast pressing into his back. And, perhaps most importantly, there was a wedding band on his finger.

This was not good.

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After a minor freak out which awoke his bedmates, and ended up with a knife being held to his throat for a moment until the Asian woman recognized him, Harry ended up nursing a coffee while his two bedmates, who turned out to be his new wives, explained what had happened last night.

Apparently, Harry and a few others had come into a bar and bought drinks for everyone. In the process, he and the two women had gotten flirty. They admitted to being a little drunk themselves when he asked them to marry him, and they said yes.

So they became Shenhua Potter and Frederica Black, respectively.

The Asian woman that had held a knife to him was Shenhua. She was taller than him, and had a very nicely sized bust. Her grey eyes weren't exactly the most welcoming, but she was definitely a bombshell.

The other woman was Frederica. A couple inches shorter than Harry, she was dressed in gothic clothing. Her blue eyes were both hard, and filled with emotion. With a very noticeable scar across her throat, she was speaking with a mechanical device of some sort she held against her throat. Despite the obvious scar, she was certainly attractive.

Harry couldn't say he was unhappy to have them as his wives. Though now, them having explained to him their respective jobs, he wondered how the hell to tell them he was a wizard….

And that their marriage was permanent, and enforced by magic.

Merlin, he hoped his friends were having better mornings.

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Not far away, Ginny was enjoying a pleasant morning with her new husband.

While she had been surprised to wake up in a strange place, in bed with a strange man and a wedding ring on her finger, Rotton 'the Wizard' as he had given his name, didn't have the same knee-jerk reaction Shenhua had.

After making some coffee, the two had sat down to discuss things as the coffee took the edge off of their respective hangovers.

Rotton was especially ecstatic when she revealed she was an actual witch.

And as she got to know her new husband, whom thanks to magic she couldn't divorce, she resolved to figure out what happened to her friends and brother later.

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Ronald Weasley was not having a good morning.

After being abruptly awoken, in a strange place no less, he'd had a gun promptly pressed to his head by an, admittedly attractive, Asian looking woman with a tribal tattoo on her shoulder.

He'd then discovered, when she had asked, "What the FUCK is this?" while she held up her left hand to show a wedding band, that she was his new wife.

The redhead had barely gotten out an explanation that she was his new wife, he was a wizard, and that magic would enforce their marriage, when she started swearing…a lot.

He'd barely gotten his pants on when she started chasing him, shooting bullets in his direction.

Which was what led him to running half naked through the streets of a strange city as the newly minted Rebecca 'Revy' Weasley chased her new husband.

Ron was unaware she was just making sure he realized who wore the pants in their relationship.

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Hermione hadn't drunk as much as her friends had, thus though she now realized she was impaired at the time, remembered the previous night's events.

She knew she didn't really have anyone to blame but herself, and the sex with her new husband had been amazing. He was defiantly worthy of the name Rock.

Still she was hung-over.

So when she was awoken but screaming (which she recognized as Ron's), Swearing (which she vaguely recalled as being from Ron's new wife), and gunshots from a nearby apartment, she merely groaned, and snuggled closer into her sleeping husband.

She'd worry about everything when her damn hangover was gone.

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Neville Longbottom wasn't sure what to think.

On one hand, he was now married to a very attractive older woman.

On the other, he'd been drunk when he married her and magic would enforce their marriage. As he was learning this morning, she was absolutely ruthless (which he admitted was turning him on a little). And, most importantly, he had no idea what the hell he was going to tell his Gran.

Still Sofiya 'Balalaika' Longbottom, certainly held up the tradition of fierce Longbottom women.

He just wished she could have waited a few days, or at least until he was no longer hung-over, before she introduced him to early morning workouts.

Especially workout with Russian ex-Paratroopers that wanted to make sure he was worthy of their beloved Kapitan.

As he completed his fiftieth push-up, he wasn't sure he'd make it to breakfast.

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Luna Lovegood was a very unique individual.

Unlike her friends, the blonde didn't wake up with a hangover, and she certainly didn't regret her marriage.

Even if it was to an undercover CIA operative.

Eda was hot, and Luna's friends were still close. So she saw no problems.

Being the first to awake in their bed at the church, Luna decided to wake her new wife up properly, and slipped underneath the covers.

Besides, it wasn't as though Eda was a real nun, and her pussy was absolutely delicious.

Perhaps she'd try brewing a futanari potion, that way one of them could end up pregnant. Perhaps Eda would even be willing to take it and screw her ass.

'Yes," Luna thought, as she lowered her lips to her wife's folds, 'That would be fun.'

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Draco Malfoy didn't even have the will to scream as he sat in the corner of a room in another part of the church.

After waking up, he'd been horrified to find himself naked and in bed with an old woman that was wearing an eye patch.

Her thanks for the excellent fuck as she left to prepare for the morning hadn't helped him at all.

What on earth had possessed him to do what he had done?

He wasn't sure what to do now.

He'd married the old bitch for Merlin's sake, and magic would enforce the marriage.

Why the hell did he have to drink with Potter!

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**Hope you enjoyed. And if you didn't figure out, the marriages are as follows:**

**Harry/Shenhua/Sawyer the Cleaner**

**Ginny/Rotton the Wizard**

**Ron/Revy**

**Hermione/Rock**

**Neville/Balalaika**

**Luna/Eda**

**Draco/Yolanda**

**Please Review, Check Out the Challenges in My Forums, and the Stories I have for Adoption under the title ****_Please Adopt Me!_**


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